I wanted to show off some of the new designs pulled from my busy mind. I make these cuties as a hobby and like to make peoples ears happy and sparkling. If any of you are ever interested hit me up here or on my sister site or Facebook. “Midnight Travellers Art”
The sun is shinning
The air smells of the moist warm earth
The sweet spring breeze touches my shoulders and cheeks,
Nine robins graze on berries in the mountain ash tree in the back yard…
over head two red tail hawks glide and dance on the warm air currents…
I think I am being told something
I think I will need to accept the fact that until I get it all out of my system I will be an abstract artist for life. My mind does not see just a butterfly. There is so much more to it. To all of it. I have a paint throwing artist in my head covered from eyebrow to the soul of my foot with Paint charcoal and pencil…..I don’t want it any other way. 🙂
back to the drawing paper bitches. Too much to get done 🙂 (yes I did do the mental mic drop…boom)
I had lunch with my mom yesterday. We have done this only one time before. She said something to me that stuck in my mind and touched my heart. She said:
“No matter what you choose in your life, I will support you and stand beside you.”
Knowing that my mother, whose opinion matters deeply, loves and supports me no matter what. She said along with that later that night, when I called and thanked her, said:
“Your kids will do whatever they feel is right no matter what when they are older
so I need to stand by them.”
I have gotten closer to my mother over the past few years. Especially this last year. It finally feels like we are equal adults, and able to talk without me feeling like a child anymore. It is a blessing to feel the support of my decisions, even though I would decide what I thought was right without approval. We all have to follow our hearts and guts and pray for the guidance along our own personal journeys.
Being confident in yourself, and your God leading your path, knowing that you are doing what is best for you, your family, your loved ones, is what matters.
Taking each day at a time. Not worrying. Loving completely. Laugh. Pray. Encourage. Forgive. Motivate yourself. Take time for You. Dance. Live. Be silent. Be loud. Be You. Give Kindness. Help others when you see a need. Be Chivalrous. Sing too loud. Be happy you have air in your lungs and a day to live to its fullest.
“See others for what and who they Are
Not for what You want them to be”
My first thought of the day was “Fuck you 3am”, and “How much coffee will it take to make it through the day?!!” I wish I could have gotten back to sleep. I stared at the ceiling for a long time, laid there forcing my eyes closed listening to my pig dream about eating something, wrote a few things which I will attempt to get out into the universe this morning, thought about writing some more, thought about my future, thought about my present. Finally got up and was out of the shower by 5:03. Goody me.
I am reading the book called Committed by Elizabeth Gilbert, the same woman who wrote Eat Pray Love. I love her style of writing.
Now it occurred to me last night, or shall I say early this morning, that one of her phrases: “Sow Expectations, Reap Disappointments” is a very deep and real thing. This fact is so true and I would have to say that I agree with it completely. If I expect anything from anyone in this world, I am either let down, disappointed or my feelings get hurt. I have been fighting with this situation for a while now and after seeing those words on paper really struck a chord. Enough to make me go “Huh!” almost out loud while I lay in the pre dawn suspended state of awareness.
I also made up a questionnaire to post but will have to think on that one a bit before I post it, I want to be able to get the feedback that is needed without it being confusing to do so. It is questions for men and women about each others wants and needs, I will be requesting Brutal honest from anyone who reads it. I like honesty, and look forward to seeing if anyone has the balls to spit out what they really feel. Not many like to do that. But here I have no fear and would like to see who else doesn’t as well. 🙂
I wrote a poem, well saw a poem, that I am going to try to write this morning as well. It was very powerful vision of a poem. We will see if I still have it in me to write like I used too. Possibly “Screaming Fire” is what it will be named. We will see.
Lets get this shit started.
Oh man woke up with a bitching head ache, crabby beyond all reason, and somehow still able to find a mask to put on before I face my kids. It’s not their fault I don’t want to be part of society today. I had to turn on music so the clicking of game controllers stopped beating like symbols in my brain. I took 4 ibuprofen, and hope it will help. I think it might be a Skylar Grey day, along with quiet knitting and reflection. Actually let myself have a Saturday, aside from watching my nephew play his first basketball game, very exciting, and lunch with my mom and sister. That will be nice, mostly because I don’t have to try to be happy or in a good mood. They accept me the way I am…moods and all. 🙂
Pancakes wait for no one and it would taste like shit in the powder form and not cooked. Off to the kitchen…its closer to my coffee pot anyways 😀
Happiness is here 🙂
I could stay there for weeks…
How many times do I have to have the same epiphany about the same shit, it’s the little things that I stress about that I really don’t need to stress about. I blame having space in my brain that isn’t filled with flowers….I should fill it with flowers again. I need to fill it with flowers and stuff anyways. I have Spring crawling up the driveway like a worm on steroids getting ready to knock on my door and slap me in the face, or make me slip on it and fall on my ass… Lets hope for the last one. I really don’t need to fall on my ass when I have this big of a responsibility on my shoulders. But the best thing I can do is be prepared for it and get all the knowledge I can and keep it in there for future use. That would be the smart thing to do. There is no one to teach me but me. And that is a little difficult being your own teacher and driving yourself forward. But I guess if I ever want to have my own business and to run things myself then I need to have that self motivation and preservation in my blood and hardwired into my mind on a continual basis.
I have felt better today, mentally probably because I got up when the pigs wanted breakfast and stayed awake as opposed to laying in bed for another hour making myself even more tired. It helped to have that quiet time before the house was awake.
I need to remind myself somehow…and I will work on the method …as to how to keep myself reminded of what I am capable of doing. How strong I am mentally and what I can do. What I have overcome and what I can overcome. What God can do in my life, and where he can lead me.
Patience…I need patience.
There is some sort of messed up emotional rollercoaster floating through my teen boys head and its insane! 🙂 I m sure you other moms out there get what I m saying. Wow. Love that boy to pieces but man I think the teen years are going to be the hardest for us. I am hoping the girl is easier when it comes to the teen years. She already is, which means one easy…one more challenging child. Bring it on 🙂 I am ready….I will need more coffee though. 🙂