Why is it that when sleep hovers above my door step…I struggle to take its hands and drift away to a dream world of peace and adventure…my eyes burn, my head aches, yet I lay here…sweet mistress of sleep, I will deny you no longer. May the nights aroma linger heavy upon my lids, until dawn touches my brow bringing the nectar of the morrow.

current mood

What’s my mood? (Insert Music notes here)

Pandora music consisting of: Slipknot “Vermillion, Pt. 2”, Secondhand Serenade, Three Doors Down, Bob Dylan, Stevie Nicks “Landslide”

Music to keep the mind calm…keeping it real

a message

The sun is shinning

The air smells of the moist warm earth

The sweet spring breeze touches my shoulders and cheeks,

Nine robins graze on berries in the mountain ash tree in the back yard…

over head two red tail hawks glide and dance on the warm air currents…

I think I am being told something

Tears of Love

to love you beyond sanity is like breathing

the soul and essence of your being calls to me

for what feels like forever I have lain beside you

craving you more and more with each passing moment

to gaze upon your face for hours

feeling your skin wishing for immortality

for then the moment would not end.

a passenger of the night

tears of love rolling down soft cheeks

mourning the inevitable passing of time

grasping tightly

devouring the intoxicating scent of your body

with great reverence you pour into my mind

invading all the voids thereof

completing what was once fragments of a song

in the midst of our memories

shall we lay for eternity

I remain yours




I think I will need to accept the fact that until I get it all out of my system I will be an abstract artist for life. My mind does not see just a butterfly. There is so much more to it. To all of it. I have a paint throwing artist in my head covered from eyebrow to the soul of my foot with Paint charcoal and pencil…..I don’t want it any other way. 🙂

back to the drawing paper bitches. Too much to get done 🙂 (yes I did do the mental mic drop…boom)

What does a woman need?…my thoughts…not that complicated…

This morning I was hunting for some coffee pictures and came across a few ones about Women. Some made me happy, others depressed me. The ones that depressed me did so because I don’t think I really know what its like to be a “Real” Girl. Does that make sense? (So this is pertaining to relationships, just to be clear and say the other shit in my head.)

I don’t know what it’s like to be someone’s everything. To be the someone they can’t see their life existing without. To be that someone who is not just a convenience to have, but a necessity to their existence, and a desirable being to have beside them. To be the someone who is looked forward too, and thought of as and equal.

I am a woman. I am definitely full of all different kinds of emotions and desires. Mostly of how I would like to feel and be loved. I think there is a misjudgment about how much attention we really need as women. It seems like men think we need all this out pouring constant flow of attention. This is not true. However, what we do need, if you plan on keeping us around for a long time possibly forever, is a little bit of honest real attention each day. It can be the most simplest of acts that show us how you feel.

Eye contact before you kiss us, with an arm around us, possibly followed by a warm hug. We know when you are just doing it to get it over with. It makes us feel like we are a part of you for that one moment, special and cared for. You are our safety, comfort and part of us. When a kiss is true, all our troubles melt away. You do have that super power, pretty cool huh.

Saying “I Love You” and meaning it. Yes we also know when you just say it to say it. We love hearing these words. And yes we are insecure and want to hear them everyday. It is part of who we are. We need to be reassured that we are the ones in your mind, not anyone else. We will always feel threatened by other women out there, therefore, we like knowing that we are yours and you are ours.

Having a conversation with us, even though you may not know what we are talking about or if we get all excited and bubbly when we talk, or if we are just talking about our day. We like talking about our days. It makes us feel good to share how we felt, what we experienced and it makes us feel closer to you by sharing our day. We understand if you don’t want to talk about yours, but ask us how our day was with true interest and see how our eyes light up, it will ignite a spark inside of us making us feel loved by you.

Hold us, for no apparent reason, and with no additional intention and for longer than a quick squeeze. In doing this you will secure your bond with us in our hearts. In your arms we feel like the world doesn’t matter around us. We are absorbed into heart and find a peace so pure it can make us weep. Your arms are our home, where we can exhale and feel like everything is OK. This is another superpower that can bring forth many rewards to both the man and woman. You can feel like the protector, the impenetrable castle wall that keeps its treasures safe from harm, the enforcer of peace and security.  There are so many times a woman just wants to be held…and that’s all…there is so much comfort in that one act, you will be amazed at how it makes us feel. 

Through out an honest compliment, about anything about us. Even a small compliment goes a long way…like a long way. Even if you are just saying: you look pretty today. or. did you do something with your hair, I like it. or. you have a beautiful smile.   I mean any compliment, from the heart, means a great deal to our confidence in how you see us. Believe it or not we feel self conscious a lot around you no matter how long we have been together and would like to know that you see us still. By “see us” I mean you see the woman in front of you, you see her and only her. She is the one who catches your eye and keeps it. When you “see us” we know you care for us, we know you hold us higher in your hearts as someone who you love and desire.

Be honest with her. Don’t ever lie to herNo matter what. Neither person should ever lie to each other no matter how small it is. If she catches you in a lie it will form doubt where you did not want doubt. Remember all the emotions we have in our heads and hearts? Even the smallest lie can escalate into something way worse than it is. We will think the worst, even if it wasn’t that big of a lie. We will go to the extent of you cheating on us, even if you just fibbed about a small detail. Because in our eyes, why lie if it wasn’t to hide some other bigger secret. Show honesty and you will get it. Don’t show it and we are gone. We expect the same response from you.

When a woman loves a man, and feels that same love in return…unconditional and true…There is nothing she wont do for that man. She will put his needs above her own. She will admire, and respect him. She will devote her complete self to him. She will honor him, she will care for him. She will worry about him, she will share in his hardships as if they were her own. She will love him like he has never been loved before. She will make him her world…if she is treated the same in return.

“If you make her your world

 She will give you hers in return,

and will remain yours for eternity”

I know there are many things I could add to this but these are the first ones that stand out in my head. Feel free to post comments on others you feel are important to you. I would love the input.

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